I was talking to Lady Macbeth the other day, and she suggested that I should start a blog. I’m not much of a writer, but Lady Macbeth convinced me in the end. This is how it went down:
Lady M: “Ross! Ross! Have you seen my blog?”
Me: “Your…what? Should I get the doctor?”
Lady M: “No, silly, my blog! Here, see? You can write things here, and other people can see them!”
Me: “Well….good for you, Lady M.”
Lady M: “You should start a blog, Ross! We could put each others’ sites on our blogrolls!”
Me: “I…don’t know.”
Lady M: “Pleeeease?”
Me: “Fine.”
And so here I am. *sigh*
Tags: blog, lady macbeth
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Man, I love wars (especially when we’re winning).
I was over in Fife earlier today; the Norweyans had a stonghold there. Remember the Thane of Cawdor? That traitor was assisting the King of Norway in killing all of our noble Scotsmen. It was looking pretty dismal for our side.
Anyway, I say they had a stronghold there because, as you may guess, the battle turned and we slowly began to beat the Norweyans back. Long story short, we won.
Our troops wanted something for their services, of course. I know it’s a little bit unethical, but we wouldn’t let the Sweno bury his men until he gave us $10,000 to distribute. Now he says he wants a treaty, but I don’t think King Duncan will be that merciful. Oh well.
But I’m just wasting time talking - I’m going to go tell the King the good news: he’ll probably want to know what happened.
Tags: battle, norway, norweyans, scotland, Sweno, war
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So I went and reported to King Duncan.
Apparently this guy MacBeth saved our butts today. The King (God save him) has ordered the traitor Thane of Cawdor executed, and his title given to Macbeth instead.
I’m off to go tell the executioner to have the current Thane’s head, then I’ve got to go tell Macbeth his new position. Don’t they have messengers for this type of thing?
Tags: king duncan, macbeth, scotland, thane
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Ok. So I found Macbeth walking with another general from the army (Banquo, I think? What an odd name.)
I approached them and told Macbeth how King Duncan loved him, and how speechless the King was of his great honors, how we were supposed to bring him to see the King, how he was now Thane of Cawdor…blah blah blah.
I figured he would be all “OMG Thx Ross!” or at least “Thank you, Ross. I shall come anon.” But the silly old fool just stared at me for a bit, before whispering something to Banquo. Those two…they seem suspicious. Anyway, after whispering amongst themselves for a bit, I received a curt “Thanks for your pains. Let us toward the King.”
God. What a jerk.
Tags: Banquo, king duncan, macbeth, thane
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Aw, crap.
King Duncan was killed last night. There was a big party at Macbeth’s place because of his victories over the last Thane of Cawdor and the King of Norway. We are pretty sure that the guards that were standing outside of Duncan’s room got drunk and ended up stabbing him (several times) in the back.
Donalbain and Malcom went missing a little while ago. Macduff thinks that they must have paid the guards to off the King. Really, they’re the only people at the party who would have had anything to gain from the King’s death.
We were going to interrogate the guards, but that idiot Macbeth went into a rage and killed them both. God damn him. And to add insult to injury, because Malcolm and Donalbain fled, he’s the closest relative to the King - so guess who has the throne now? Aargh. Well, I’m going to Scone to see him crowned, the idiot.
Tags: king duncan, macbeth
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It’s official. The new King of Scotland is crazy.
A bunch of us lords were at a party after the crowning of the new king. Macduff, Banquo, and Banquo’s son weren’t there, so I’m not sure they were all that happy about Macbeth’s being crowned.
A little way into the feast King Macbeth gets up to go talk to someone at the door. When he comes back, we invite him to sit where Banquo was supposed to be. He looks at the empty chair and says “The table’s full.” We think he’s being modest and ask him again to sit. Then he goes into this rage at the empty chair telling it not to shake its bloody head. Yeah…what?
My initial impression is that the King is not well. I stand and ask for some help from the rest of the attendees to help me get him off to bed when Lady Macbeth stops us and bids us to sit down. Apparently he’s been like this since he was little - he goes off and has little fits of insanity. Oh, geez.
Well, she was right. She talked to him for a bit and he finally calmed down enough to explain himself, when he starts his rantings again. I think he’s seeing things. It was kind of unnerving. By then Lady Macbeth asks us to leave. Thank God. That was a really awkward party.
I have some reservations about Macbeth. I’m not sure if an insane king is the best leader of Scotland.
Tags: Banquo, lady macbeth, macbeth, macduff, scotland
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Keep this on the DL, but rumor has it that King Macbeth was the one that murdered King Duncan. I’m not sure what to believe, but if that performance at his feast was any indiciation, Macbeth is crazy. Who knows what he could have done?
Tags: macbeth
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Hey guys,
I have a favor to ask. I think that Lady Macduff believes that her husband was a good-for-nothing coward. I mean, I know that he left Scotland to go ask the King of England for some troops to help unseat King Macbeth (ssh!) but I’m not sure that she realizes how noble he is. Things are going to get better for Scotland with men like him helping.
I’m going to go talk to her. If you see Lady Macduff in the next few weeks, could you help her see that her husband is a good guy?
UPDATE: Oops, I was over at Macduff’s place when I realized that I forgot to take the cake out of the oven. It’s an angelfood for the party tomorrow night. I’m going to head back now.
UPDATE 2: OH GOD. I went back to Macduff’s place and there was blood everywhere. Lady Macduff and her son and the servants and…everyone in Macduff’s castle (even the women and children) is dead. It looks like they were all brutally murdered. It was a massacre in there.
I need to go tell Macduff. I’m going to run to England to tell him the news.
Tags: lady macduff, macduff
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I tried to break the news to Macduff gently, but it’s kind of hard to say “Hey Macduff, your wife and kid and everyone who you ever cared about has been murdered” in a gentle manner. He actually took it fairly well. Perhaps he is still in shock.
While I was there, I found out that Macduff and Malcolm had managed to appeal to the King of England and had gotten an army together to help dethrone Macbeth. It’s 10,000 men strong, and Siward is going to be leading it. With the news of his wife’s death, Macduff made the decision to march now. Macbeth (with all of his what…dozen remaining supporters) is going down for sure.
I’m headed back with the army to help fight. We’re going to take cover in some woods and then storm Macbeth’s stronghold. This is going to be awesome.
For Scotlaaaand!
Tags: macbeth, macduff, malcolm, scotland
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Yeah! Macbeth is dead (we have his head) and Malcolm is King of Scotland! The battle was epic.
We all hid in the woods below Macbeth’s castle. As we marched up the hill to battle, we carried some branches in front of our faces to hide our numbers. It’s probably looked like the whole forest was marching up the hill (Ha! That would be silly. Trees marching?).
Our troops easily defeated what remained of Macbeth’s forces. Some of his former supporters even joined our side. Macbeth should have known - troops led from fear instead of loyalty never stick around.
There was a rather sad casualty on our side, however. It looks like Siward’s son was trying to be heroic, taking on Macbeth himself. Truely, he was a noble warrior. When we found his body, his wounds were on his front side. He died fighting - a heroic death to be sure. I had the honor of telling Siward of his son’s heroism.
All hail Malcolm, King of Scotland!
Tags: macbeth, macduff, malcolm, scotland, siward
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You know, I’m not sure that this blogging thing is working out. I’m trying, but it’s hard to find time during the day to write something. Alas.
Sorry guys, this is going to be my last post for a while. If you need anything, feel free to write me a letter.
~The Thane of Ross
Tags: thane
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